It has taken me years to write this blog. Why, you ask? Because every time I’d sit down to write it, I would go on the biggest rant of my life. As someone who spends a lot of time drafting articles for clients and who also did a communications degree, I know ranting about your thoughts does not make for a good blog. What I realised is that I needed to understand the issue in more depth, and I can confidently say, I have. So, here is why I hate being called a ‘girl boss’.
We live in a modern world. A world where women are not simply looking after children, doing the washing, cooking breakfast, lunch and dinner, and managing the household. We women are out in the world – leading countries, board rooms and companies, immersing ourselves into previously male-dominated worlds. I genuinely appreciate the progression we have made in creating equality for men and women in the workplace. However, there is still a term that floats around that diminishes the strength women can provide to an organisation, and that term is ‘girl boss’.
I have heard several versions of this phrase in my years of working in the London re/insurance market – ’she-EO’, ‘boss babe’, ‘she-ro’, ‘fempreneur’ – the list goes on (even ‘girl power’ irks me). While people may see this as bigging up women and supporting them in the workplace, in my eyes and according to others commenting on this subject on the internet, it actually dumbs it down. I don’t want the fact I am a woman to be a factor when compared to my male colleagues when working. I want to be judged for my work ethic and character without bias.
When considering this, another word comes to mind that is typically misunderstood – feminism. According to the dictionary, feminism is defined as the advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of equality of the sexes. Being a feminist literally means wanting equal rights between men and women, not one over the other. This term is often misunderstood, especially by men. Men often don’t want to be considered feminists because of how the word sounds. They think it sounds more feminine, meaning they are more feminine, given the name starts with the Latin-derived word “fem”. This assumption is, however, completely incorrect.
Entering a male-dominated industry, I was in awe of all the different awards, events and even social clubs that championed women. While I still love that these exist, why are we separating ourselves from our male counterparts? It is lovely to have these things available, but we should be competing alongside the men when it comes to our success.
The first time I came across someone who didn’t want to be included in women-focused awards and panels was working with a CEO of one of my clients. She completely changed my view on the events that recognise women. She’d made it to the same level as the men in this industry, and you don’t become a CEO merely by meeting diversity requirements; you have skill and extensive expertise in your area. She has since gone on to lead other businesses, maintaining the same messaging.
When speaking to my friends on this subject, all of them agreed – if you call us a girl boss or anything related to this, we feel like our job is significantly knocked down a few levels. As said by one of my friends, “I understand the sentiment of ‘girl boss’ and particularly in the re/insurance industry, where there might be a need for it. But I hope that we can get to a stage where gender is irrelevant to someone being a boss.” The term used to come across as powerful, but since working in this industry further, it makes me feel like what I’m doing is the ‘girly’ version of a job.
As I mentioned earlier, I have been trying to write this blog for some time, and you know what sparked it? The Paris Olympics. I used to ride horses competitively and have always followed the sport. What I truly appreciate about equestrian sports is the gender equality. For the summer Olympics, there isn’t another sport where men and women compete side by side for the same podium. Of course, the partnership between the person and the horse is a huge factor, but the entire event, in every discipline, is purely based on skill. A beautiful thing to encounter and I don’t think many people recognise this. Obviously, other sports aren’t the same, but it feels significant to me.
I will admit, women are not always helpful in changing this narrative. We have called ourselves she-EOs (as heard in Selling Sunset, a popular reality show about the real estate market in LA, with mostly female characters). We have put ourselves in a box, but we need to see ourselves as more than this. We aren’t just she-EOs, we are CEOs. We aren’t just girl bosses, we are bosses. We are infiltrating male-dominated industries, turning them into simply ‘industries’. We can do anything a man can do and men can do anything a woman can do. We need to be striving for equality across all sectors, continuing to build an accepting culture.